(no subject)

well i really fucked up. i had sex with another girl. and continued to talk to her. i dont know why i would do this. i dont know what i was thinking to destroy such a beautiful happiness. me and corinne have always had problems but thats no reason for me to do what i've done. i find my self telling lies and then more little lies when i dont even need to lie. but yesterday i had some kind of eye opening experience. idk what happened or anything. it just hit me that i'mnot sure i'll ever be able to be truely happy with out corinne being in my life. and i just want a chance to make it right. have her be THE ONE  i love this girl with all of my heart and i am willing to do anything and everything for her just to have a chance to keep her in it. but good god i love this girl. this girl i've wronged so badly. i just want to live life like i had. things will be different and things will be better. i just have to have her or else my life will be filled with pain of trashing the most beautiful thing in life. i'll never forgive my self for what i have done and never truely understand why i did it. but what i do know is that i will never ever do it again. corinne deserves the best in the world and i plan to do my best to give it to her. shit if it makes her happy i'll buy her shit take her beautiful places. just to see that beautiful smile on her face is priceless. hod i just need to have her back. i cant belive what i have done.


i love her with everything in my life! i am completely yours and forever will be. i just hope she gives me this chance. god i know she wont regret it! this gives us the perfect chance to have a relationship and to fix any problems that were in the old one. i guess i needed her more then i could see. but she def is all that i want! please give me this chance to live our love.

(no subject)

im getting my kitten and im so fucking happy. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cant wait to go on this trip for corinne's mom's graduation and then get come and get this kitten. corinne will be annoyed but she'll love it just as just as me. im so happy! this little thing will make me happy all the time!
best thing i have ever done for my self by my self.

its like this that and this

"Remember that time that I made you so mad
Last week right ha ha you know that
It's not like it's all that rare
So put it here and let me cherish the embarrassment
I realize I've been a dick head yes
And I respect how you question your investments
I take the plane but it ain't to be impressive
It feels like a cop out to label it lessons
I've been though the rain but I've put other people through a hurricane just to work the game
Some time I swim through so much shame
I think my little man's blessed that he didn't get my last name
And here you are right in front of me offering it all like tell me what you want from me
I wanna love you today and forever
Let me clear my through and rub my wings together

It goes: I'm not perfect but I'm this that and this
My hands are dirty and I'm this that and this
You've been searching for this that and this
Let's break the surface and make a little happy mess

Whoo girl, you're the most beautiful thing I've seen
Enticing, exciting
Even the sound of your voice gotta nice ring
Ya seem like the type that might help me tighten up my pipe dreams
We can keep digging through this dirt
Team up, you and I against the universe
Think about it, What cha say to your self
You can wear my cape and I can play with your belt
The truth is there now
Stand with me, look into that mirror now
And tell me you don't see the same image
Gonna be a brand name babe once the rain is finished

It goes: I'm not perfect but I'm this that and this
My hands are dirty and I'm this that and this
You've been searching for this that and this
Let's break the surface and make a little happy mess

I can't believe she got me on a ball and chain
It's not a complaint, I appreciate it
For all the dumb mistakes I make I'm surprised baby girl ain't threw me away
I never meant to hurt no one, I just want to stay productive till the work is done
I dance to a sertain drum, but when I fell off beat you didn't turn and run, no
You see me at my lowest low
You gave me sight when I had broken focus
With a smile that opens up like a rose bud
Even when it all seemed so fucking hopeless
And here you are right in front of me
Offering it all like tell me what you want from me
I want to thank you today and forever
Let's make a little happy mess together
You know

It goes: I'm not perfect but I'm this that and this
My hands are dirty and I'm this that and this
You've been searching for this that and this
Let's break the surface and make a little happy mess"